Here are some things that surely you will appreciate knowing about me.
When I pick up an unplugged toaster – I always worry that there might be some leftover electricity in there that’s just waiting to shock me.
If someone happens to leave just a few swallows of milk in the jug, I will throw it away even if it’s not near the expiration date. I think milk sours quicker if there’s just a little bit of it.
I used to worry that if I went to sleep with the blanket over my head that I’d get SIDS and die. I don’t worry about that anymore. But I still leave an air hole…just in case.
I have conditioned myself so that I cannot sleep unless I have earplugs in. Even if I’m somewhere quiet. It’s something about the feeling of them in my ears that I need.
Poking people I don’t like with a thumbtack is a favorite fantasy of mine. Not a flat thumbtack. One of those that you can hold easily. So it can be yanked out and used to poke again and again.
You can find other weird things about me here & here.
34 Comments, Comment or Ping
And you wonder why we love you so damn much !!!!
TV
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
I do. It makes me wonder about you all.
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February 4th, 2009 3:33 pm
Damn girl…I agree that’s why we like you. My sister could not sleep without her earplugs…I thought she was nuts…..hahahaha!!!
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
Have you ever tried earplugs? They are the best sleep ever! I take them with me where ever I go. They’re even great to use in the car if the kids are yammering (when I’m a passenger, of course).
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February 4th, 2009 3:48 pm
Speaking of poking someone… I once put a thumbtack in a co-workers chair. ALWAYS wanted to do it… so one day I did.
He screamed like a girl and acted like I tried to kill him.
I didn’t get fired though, or even reprimanded. Everyone else thought he was an ass and though it was hilarious!
So satisfying.
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 4:21 pm
Oh, that is good! Know what you need to do to him next time? Unscrew all the pieces of his chair so it falls apart when he sits down. Don’t let anyone see you though. No witnesses.
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February 4th, 2009 4:06 pm
ok…
so i’m not the only one who thinks that about the toasters?
cool.
those fuckers will get ya.
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 4:21 pm
Exactly! I always cringe, even though I know it isn’t scientifically possible.
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February 4th, 2009 4:13 pm
The thumb tack one is AWESOME. Now I want to do that to someone, too.
Thanks for effing me up even more than I am! You’re such a bad influence. That’s why I love you.
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
I’m always glad to help further expand one’s mind. Maybe next time we meet up, we could walk around crowded places and to thumbtack stab-and-runs? Like in a crowded bar. After everyone else is drunk so they’re reflexes are slow. We can POKE and then run like ninjas!
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February 4th, 2009 6:06 pm
And THIS is why I love you.
So, the thumbtack thing reminded me of this story (I will try to be brief, but don’t count on it):
When I was in Kindergarten, we went to a home daycare every day. Since I was the oldest, I was the only one in school and had to walk by myself most days.
I met this girl who was 2 grades older that walked the same route and we started walking together and kind of became friends.
One morning, I woke up and decided that I just hated her (it was literally the first thing I thought when I woke up). So, I left for school early so I wouldn’t have to walk with her. THEN, I found her in her classroom line, walked up to her and without saying one word, I dug my fingernails into her arm as hard as I could and walked away. Never saying anything.
The fingernail thing came from my mom who has had long nails and would dig them into our arms at church when we were misbehaving.
You could try that!
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Chickie said:
February 4th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Oh, wow. That poor girl never knew what hit her! Unfortunately, my nails are weak and would break off in someone’s skin – leaving behind incriminating DNA evidence.
When I was a kid, I took a rock to school in my backpack and knocked the beans out of a kid that was annoying me. I miss those days.
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February 4th, 2009 7:49 pm
I can assure you that you are safe from the toaster and virtually all other appliances while they are unplugged. AC power does not get “stuck” in things after we unplug them. If you shuffle across the carpet in socks and touch the toaster though, plugged in or not, all bets are off.
Don’t worry, even though it’s my job and I know better, I still think it occasionally too.
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Chickie said:
February 5th, 2009 at 10:00 pm
Sure, Mr. Expert. So you say. But what if there was some sneaky voltage in there? Better safe than sorry. I try to make the kids put up the toaster so I don’t have to deal with it.
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February 5th, 2009 2:17 am
LOL, LOL…I understand all these better than I probably should, my dear Especially the Milk thing….I believe you are absolutely correct about that!
Put that film on my Netflix Queue…..Thanks for the recomendation!
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Chickie said:
February 5th, 2009 at 10:01 pm
I’m just super picky about milk. I can open up a brand new jug and imagine that it smells bad. I don’t breathe when I’m pouring milk to avoid that.
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February 5th, 2009 3:52 am
The thumb tack thing made me giggle with crazed glee. If you come to NC for a visit, I will give you a package of tacks and pictures of people to stab.
In short, I will take you to work with me. One of my co-workers desperately needs to be rendered into a walking voodoo doll.
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Chickie said:
February 5th, 2009 at 10:02 pm
We’ll need duct tape too. To tape coworker up in a fetal position and prop him (or her) up in the corner so there’s no escape. Nothing is better than torture at leisure.
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February 5th, 2009 8:53 pm
I think small amount of milk spoil more quickly to. And, although I’m sure that you know this, even if a toaster was plugged in, there isn’t enough voltage to do any permanent damage. So there’s no way that an unplugged one could be harmful.
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Chickie said:
February 5th, 2009 at 10:21 pm
A plugged in one wouldn’t kill me? Are you serious? I figured it was light sticking a wet finger into a light socket.
Not that I’ll try it now or anything.
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February 5th, 2009 10:16 pm
Dude! I’m the same way with earplugs.
But it’s phrases like “leftover electricity” that make me love you.
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 10:46 pm
You know, I never thought that thinking of leftover electricity was odd until now. I’ve always imagined little electric molecules, just kind of hanging around in places.
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February 5th, 2009 11:01 pm
Dude, the toaster thing… classic. This is like vintage Chickie. You need to put “leftover electricity” on a t-shirt with like a picture of an unplugged toaster.
OR OR… and here is a handy idea…
Amy shouldn’t be commenting after a few bloody marys (maries?)
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 10:47 pm
Amy should comment whenever she damn well pleases! :)
I really like the shirt idea. That may have to be done.
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February 5th, 2009 11:06 pm
Wow, and here I thought I was the only one!
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 10:47 pm
Nope. Not alone!
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February 6th, 2009 1:21 pm
You say the things the rest of us are thinking. And thank goodness.
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 10:48 pm
The rest of you should say this stuff. That way I don’t worry that I’m weird.
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February 6th, 2009 5:42 pm
You won’t get SIDS, but you can get a “Turtle Headache” where you don’t get enough air…
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 10:49 pm
Never had a turtle headache. But I have turned turtle a couple of times. I’m usually able to get back up on my own.
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February 6th, 2009 7:19 pm
What can I say? You are too funny and that is why I love you!!!
DON’T DO THE VOODO DOLLS!!! It is a long story…
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Chickie said:
February 7th, 2009 at 11:56 pm
Hey, how did you know I have voodoo dolls?
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February 7th, 2009 11:49 pm
Despite what my dear Turtle friend will tell you, I place electricity firmly in the realm of “magic”. Kind of like how the internet works. And Cell phones. Magic, can be unpredictable and dangerous. Where do those leftover charges go if they aren’t in the toaster? Huh, huh?
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Chickie said:
February 8th, 2009 at 5:45 pm
This is what I’m saying! Isn’t there something about how matter can’t be destroyed? That electricity has to be lurking around somewhere. And it’s probably all pissed off that it didn’t get used when it was generated.
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February 8th, 2009 5:06 pm
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