Have I mentioned that I don’t like people to look at me? It freaks me out. I can’t eat lunch in the cafeteria at work if it’s crowded because I’m afraid I’ll get food on me and EVERYONE will see. And point. And laugh.
This phobia extends into my own house.
I have a huge problem with walking on the treadmill with an audience. AKA Sweety and the boys. I don’t want anyone to see me all sweaty and straining to merely walk. (I also hide over the sink with my back to them when eating corn on the cob. I haven’t figured out how to do that without looking like a starving person that is eating their first morsel of food in days. I love corn on the cob and eat it with gusto.) I’m totally okay with them seeing me be a graceful lump on the couch for hours on end though while my hands are wrapped around the keyboard.
Friday night I walked a mile alone. Saturday morning I got up to find that everyone else was leaving to find lunch (okay, I slept in. way in.) and I thought that I’d have plenty of time to knock out the mile on the treadmill. I get the dogs taken care of and put on my walking clothes and turn the t.v. on to GemsTV. (It is my addiction. They have some of the
ugliest most unusual jewelry I’ve ever seen and some of the salespeople remind me of rabid chipmunks. Rabid, talking, anorexic chipmunks. Please, check your channel listing and tell me if you’ve seen this. Is it really a trainwreck or am I warped?)
There I am – zooming on the treadmill with the sound of the machine in my ears and my eyes glued to the telly. I’d been zooming for just a few minutes when I noticed that LB was standing right behind me while he walked in place really fast. Like me. Like mocking me. I was startled and screamed and bailed off of the machine. BB said he was afraid that I was going to fall down and get my face scrubbed off so that’s why he didn’t sneak up on me. He should have restrained his brother too.
I didn’t get on the treadmill again on Saturday.
On Sunday, I decided that I was going to have to get over it because if I was only going to walk when I was alone then I would never walk. While the rest of the family was busy watching something on t.v., I cranked up the treadmill (they had to turn the t.v. way up to hear over it) and did my time and it was okay.
The boys weren’t here tonight so while I walked, Sweety stood behind me and kissed my sweaty ears. I’d rather have him doing that than looking right at me. And maybe he thinks I’m huffing and puffing because I’m so hot and bothered for him, right?