That blurry little foot?
It really does have five toes even though you can’t see them. She was also busy fist-pumping like she belongs on Jersey Shore.
Bean is a Fidgeter Extraordinaire. Sometimes her arms and legs are windmilling so fast that I think she’s going to launch like a hummingbird. When she’s eating and tired, she will kick the hell out of her legs. She’ll kick so much that she almost squirms off of the Milk Bar. The other night I did her a favor and held her foot and wiggled it for her while she ate. She promptly passed out.
Speaking of passing out!
She’s started really sleeping through the night! *knock on wood* The past two nights she’s been tucked into bed by 10 or so and slept right through until 7 or 8 the next morning! The first night, I woke up around 4 because my boobs were full of milk and hurting so while I pumped milk (I’m building up the stockpile for when I go back to work.) I cried because she’s growing so fast. The second night I didn’t cry but I laid awake after pumping and listened to her sleep.
I think she’s going to have Sweety’s sleep habits. She talks to herself a lot on top of being twitchy.
Sweety lost his damned mind the other night. I thought he was awake when he said, “You know what? You’re a dick.” I asked why, thinking it was because I was sitting in the bed while playing with my phone and the light was disturbing him. “You just are. And you know what? I’m going to TALK REALLY LOUD AND WAKE THE BABY UP! GUESS WHO WON’T HAVE TO GET UP AND TAKE CARE OF HER? NOT ME!” I told him that I would punch him in his jug head on my way to pick her up if he woke her and he shut up. The next morning when I said something to him I could tell that he felt bad and he kept apologizing. I told him that it was okay, that I really thought he was awake. So, how fucked up is it that I thought he was awake being a giant asshole and didn’t blink an eye at it? He’s been super great in helping me with the baby and I thought that maybe he’d just reached his limit or something.
Night before last, I was playing on my phone in the dark when he pipes up with, “Suck my dick and punch me in the face.” I asked him to repeat himself and he did. (For the record, I did not and I did not.) One night he woke up while eating a bowl of cereal and last night he got up and gorged on Oreos – he later woke up choking on Oreo puke. I’m going to start tying him to the bed.
18 Comments, Comment or Ping
Or put socks on his hands so he can’t pick up anything…
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Chickie said:
January 21st, 2012 at 9:31 pm
I really don’t think that would stop him. He’d just scoop them up. He’s very intent when eating cookies.
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January 21st, 2012 9:10 pm
Rofflmfao. Holy Hell that man is insane.
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Chickie said:
January 21st, 2012 at 9:38 pm
He says he has to be to live with me. No argument here!
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Kelly said:
January 22nd, 2012 at 3:44 pm
yeah, but still… that kind of coherency in his sleep is a level all it’s own…
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Chickie said:
January 22nd, 2012 at 7:22 pm
Oh, Kelly – check this out if you haven’t all ready!
http://www.skitteringthoughts.com/2008/08/nocturnal-fun/
I really messed with his head.
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pagankelly said:
January 25th, 2012 at 4:27 pm
Holy fuck. Can I crash with you and mess with him too?? Poor guy, funny as shit.
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January 21st, 2012 9:37 pm
You could always lock up the fridge and pantry when it’s bedtime.
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Chickie said:
January 22nd, 2012 at 7:17 pm
That is something I’ve thought about. I’m afraid he’s going to choke to death cramming cookies down his throat.
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January 22nd, 2012 12:25 am
You guys are a barrell of laughs…lol! I hope you are writing down Sweety’s Sleep Talks….I think there is a book there….!
The Bean is something else, isn’t she? I bet you just hate that you have to go back to work, Chickie….It sounds like you would be as happy as a clam if you could just stay home with her ALL the time….!
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Chickie said:
January 22nd, 2012 at 7:18 pm
Naomi, it’s killing me that I have to go back to work! I’ll be lucky if I’m not a big crying mess at work. I love being at home with her. She’s neat. :)
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January 22nd, 2012 4:08 am
“She was also busy fist-pumping like she belongs on Jersey Shore.” BWHAHAHAHAHAW! Does that phone of yours record audio .. I’d love to hear that sleep talking!
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Chickie said:
January 22nd, 2012 at 7:19 pm
I’ve got some of his sleeptalk recorded but I can’t figure out how to convert it to play here! I think I have his conversation about how all of the dams of the world are run by clowns.
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January 22nd, 2012 12:44 pm
Your daughter is a cutie. Kids do grow up fast; but, in a week or so, you won’t miss not getting up in the middle of the night.
You should write a book of what Sweety does when he’s asleep. It would be a best seller for sure; though I’m not sure what category it would be in. He really gets around when he’s not awake.
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Chickie said:
January 23rd, 2012 at 5:17 pm
Apparently, I spoke too soon – she’s woken up once the past two nights but both times she napped late in the day. I’m working on tweaking that!
I do want to at least get all of his nocturnal ramblings in one spot. Sometimes I text his conversations to myself in the middle of the night to be sure I’m not getting it wrong later because it gets so weird.
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January 22nd, 2012 7:56 pm
Ha ha ha that is so wrong. I’m sorry I laughed. I so would have took him up on the punching in the face bit lol. I would have waited until later tho and used his words against him. =)
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Chickie said:
January 25th, 2012 at 12:47 pm
Oh, I will. Heh.
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January 24th, 2012 9:38 pm
So I fell off the blog wagon for a long, long time but just remembered today that your bean was due in November (I tried to forget, I think, because that’s when mine was due). CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!! She’s so beautiful and chubby and healthy and I can’t wait to real about all your adventures in motherhood. I hope that she is the light of your life and you never stop being amazed by the miracle that is her.
xoxoxoxox
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January 27th, 2012 8:18 am
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