Hanging out with Sweety at the bowling alley on Friday night was pretty nice. Well, I was having a good time until this one lady showed up. Have you ever been around someone whose voice literally makes you cringe? This woman is the only person I’ve ever met that’s affected me this way. So I told Sweety we had to go right home after he was done bowling. (Usually he stays to socialize.) I just couldn’t handle her cackling. (And dammit, if you’re reading this and you bowl with Sweety – keep your yap shut. I don’t want to have to move my bloggy home or anything.) If I had to be trapped in a room with her or the coaew – I’d choose the coaew.

Later I was thinking about it and felt bad that I’d let one human being rain on my parade. If she was a regular fixture somewhere I was then I guess I’d have to get used to her. It was just easier to leave on Friday.

Sweety and I have been out of sorts with each other for a few days now. Sweety is really awesome 99% of the time. But that other 1%? Really fucking mean. I’d seen a lot of the RFM here lately and wasn’t taking it well. I can handle the RFM if it happens sporadically. But if it happens and I can remember the last time it happened? Then it’s happening too much. I know a lot of it is work related with him so I’ve been quiet and tried to ride it out. I decided that I was tired of riding it out and threw a grenade at him last night and we’ve both been doing a lot of thinking.

One of the things he said was it annoyed him that I’d come right in from work and get on the computer until bedtime. I pointed out that I didn’t come right in and get on the computer. First I cleaned all the trash, recycling and dirty dishes up from the kitchen. By the time I’m done with that and walk into the living room to see my three sloths on the couches? I’m not about to start cleaning at 8 o’clock at night while they watch me. I want to sit in the corner on my computer and melt into the couch.

Today we rationally talked through things and we will start getting along better.

Where did we have our talk? At the dentist’s office I mentioned in the post below right after I told him about my cell phone blowing up. That gave us the giggles and we were able to move on into a conversation without anybody getting all bent out of shape. And it helped that we were in public too. Don’t want to cause a scene.

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I am blahed out. Go read Jeni’s post and then come back.

That’s me.

Sweety has asked me what do I like anymore. What am I excited about? There isn’t anything. I just want to be left alone in the dark.

I feel like I don’t have any right to grouch about anything because so many people have it worse. Despite how much I loooooooathe my job at least I have it.

The contest at work? My team won. We were in the lead up until the second to last day. All month long, I did not boast about it or give the other team captain a hard time. But ohmyfuckingword, the one day that her team was in the lead? Crow, fucking crow. I really didn’t give a damn if my team won or not. She was so sure that her team had won and when it was announced that they did not the whining started. (I decided to give my team all a gift certificate to the cafe at work for their prize. I think I’m going to crank out the prize that Sweety suggested of wings and beer for this month’s prize. Because it was decided we’d have the same fucking contest again this month. Yee-haw.) Her team had to take more phone calls…surely the numbers hadn’t been calculated properly….blahblahblah.

She’d made little comments about how I “bribed” my team with candy and a prize. So. The. Fuck. What? Everytime one of her people sold a doohickey she’d do this squealing congratulations. Not me. I told my people to just please sell and I’d do something nice for them if we won. But that I wasn’t going to pat their backs all the time because I can’t multitask like that. I have to pay attention to the customer on my phone when I’m working.

We were in a meeting yesterday and she was taking it upon herself to try and volunteer me to our supervisor for various things. It took all I had to not tell her to shut the fuck up. That would probably get me canned. Her voice makes me want to stab my eardrums out. I want to punch her in the head. Sweety said that he will pay once to bail me out of jail as long as it isn’t a felony charge because those cost too much. I’m thinking about it.

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I’m implementing something new. I’m not bending over backwards to make it to the boys’ baseball games or jump to get them whatever the latest gadget is that they’re wanting. They want something or they want to go on an outing – I’m referring them to Sweety. I make them mind and do chores but they know that if they really want something that I’m the person to ask about it. I admit that I’ve been the “fun” parent because I want them to like me.

They are never going to love me like they do their parents and it’s making me tired to try and be a supermom when I’m not super or a mom. I’ve spent 8 years going out of my way to be at every game and chaperon every field trip that they needed me on.

I have discovered something more embarrassing than telling a man that you love him and he says nothing – saying it to your stepsons and they say nothing. I know they can squeak it out. I hear them tell their parents all of the time. I used to tell them that I loved them when I tucked them in at night and they never said it back so I quit saying it. A few weeks ago, I thought that was no reason to not tell them since I do. But since it’s just followed with awkward silence – I give up. I know the boys love me but it’s frustrating that I put forth as much effort in all around raising them as their mother or Sweety and I’m not the same.

Last Saturday, for the first time ever – I didn’t go to a baseball game when I would have been able to. I had company and I just really wasn’t relishing the idea of sitting at the game for 3 hours with the coaew a stone’s throw away. And the world didn’t end. The boys didn’t even wonder where I was.

This weekend’s game is going to be a dramafest. They play about an hour away and they have a wedding to be in on their stepfather’s side of the family that evening. After the game, Sweety has to meet the coaew somewhere with the boys. I know what the day will be like.

They’ll get beat in the baseball game. Sweety will be annoyed. The boys will be pissy. The coaew will be calling or texting constantly trying to find out where they are. I will be pissed off that we’re having to take them to meet her because she didn’t come to the game. It’s her time with them. Yes, she has a wedding that night but if they have time to go to the game then why the fuck can’t she take them?

So I told Sweety I didn’t want to go. I have absolutely no desire to even be around the aggravation that will ensue if the game runs into overtime or Sweety can’t meet her at the appointed time. Or if he shows up at the meeting place and she isn’t there yet.

He said that he’d like for me to go but understands why I don’t want to. And guess what? I’m not having any anxiety about this Saturday since I’m avoiding it. If I was going, I’d spend all week dreading it.

I also told Sweety that I probably won’t be going to their games if he isn’t there. I’m uncomfortable being around the coaew and even more so if Sweety isn’t around to talk to.

That flaming twatwad called him this weekend to ask what size pants did BB wear because she needed to buy him dress pants for the wedding. It wouldn’t have been so bad but BB was at her house. On the couch. Watching t.v. He didn’t want to miss the football game on t.v. to go shopping so she was calling for his pants size. WTF? How hard is it to either A) Tell him to get his ass up because he as to go or B) See what size pants are on his ass? Gah. Sweety let the call go to voicemail and didn’t bother calling back.

Maybe the next time she calls crying about money problems – he can tell her to talk to her husband about a mortgage bond. It’s nice that she’s never had a pot to piss in but always manages to hook up with someone who does.

Basically, I’ve decided if something extracurricular is going to stress me the hell out or make me want to cry then I’m not doing it.

23 Comments | In: coaew, grouching, husband, paid link, sprogs | | #

Last summer the laptop we had was in an accident. When we got it back it worked and I was very happy. It worked properly for maybe two weeks.

For the past year it’s been a pain in the ass. Sometimes it wouldn’t start or would be so slow that it wasn’t worth fooling with.

A few weeks ago, the laptop had another accident with a piece of heavy equipment. (That laptop is one klutzy bitch.) A big enough accident that the hard drive was crushed into pieces and instead of putting the hard drive in a new laptop case – a refurbished laptop was sent as a replacement.

In an act of true karma – the new laptop won’t go online with it’s internal wireless thingymabob. I can plug a wireless usb device in and it’ll go online but I shouldn’t have to do that. I’ve already called tech support and it sounds like I’m going to have to call somewhere else and probably send it in to be fixed. I won’t be able to call them until I’m off again next Wednesday because they work regular hours and will be closed when I get off of work.

I’m not gonna bitch too much. At the most, I’ll just end up getting a wireless usb thing for it if they can’t fix it.

The neighbor’s cat is going to get a cleansing with some waterless shampoo. It’s foam that you rub in and then towel off. I’m really afraid he’d have a heart attack if I got him wet and I do not want to deal with that. They are going on vacation for a week so I’ll take that opportunity to clean him up. If Sweety would allow it, I’d tell them that he died and we buried him while letting him live out his life in our garage.

So the boys have been here for almost 2 weeks because the coaew had a weekend getaway this past weekend. The plan was that they were going to be here til Friday and then she’d pick them up from school on Friday and have them over the weekend.

The boys had a baseball game tonight. She came and told Sweety that she was going to pick them up from school tomorrow because she “deeply missed the boys” and will wake them at the fucking asscrack of dawn on Friday to take them to school. Because she misses them. The whole point of this exercise of them being here during the school week was so they wouldn’t have to get up super freaking early to get to school. She left the game after maybe 1.5 innings. If she missed them so fucking much you’d think she’d stay longer.

I have an internal bet with myself over whether or not she’ll drop LB off here after taking BB to school on Friday morning so we can take him in an hour and a half later. You know what? She has my permission to park her damned car in the driveway and sleep while he does for that hour and a half and then SHE can take him to school. I have to admit that Sweety knows that the fact that she drops him off on Monday mornings (Why can’t she take him to eat breakfast? Spend time with him? Probably cuts into her gym time. I’m not bitter.) chaps my ass so he comes home from work to take LB to school. I’ve adjusted to taking him being here on Mondays and have taken him to school if Sweety isn’t able to because that is the schedule. If she just assumes that it’s okay to do it this Friday I will probably set her on fire.

Actually, it just occurred to me that I could really fuck up someone’s day by scattering roofing nails in my driveway.

People, I have got to find a happy medium with this cunt. As it is, it’s been over 2 years since I’ve spoken to her and honestly? I’m okay with that. But today she walked behind me with her crew of crumb-crunchers and one of them was saying my name to try and get my attention and I ignored him because I didn’t want to turn the fuck around and have to say hi to her too. Because just seeing her makes me get hot and mad. I feel like I had a good 7 years of her being a complete douche to me while I said not one bad word to her so I’m entitled to at least 7 years of her staying the hell out of my way.

Sweety told me that I was being kind of harsh to take my annoyance out on the kid. I say I didn’t really take anything out on him – perhaps my ears just don’t pick up the frequency of small children shrilly saying my name. Either I’m going to have to start talking to this bitch and her crew or else move my chair to the far side of the field so there’s no chance of them getting close to me.

I’ll probably move.

7 Comments | In: coaew, daily blah, grouching | | #

First off, no offense to any cat lovers. I LIKE CATS. Cats that live inside or stay in their yard or are respectful of boundaries. I know some of you have cats. I like your cats. I like to see pictures of them and YOUR cats seem very civilized and if you were to ever grace me with a visit – you would be more than welcome to bring your bundle of love.

Does anyone have a good method of getting rid of cats that doesn’t involve nuking the neighborhood? Our neighbors have a bunch of the hairy bastards and they keep coming into our garage and pissing on everything. And shitting. There is nothing that will make your day more glittery-special than coming home from work and stepping in catshit. We have a cat (Girl) and I love her. I feed her wet food twice a day! I wouldn’t be as upset if it was her shit. But to have it coming from a nasty pissy cat that bullies the hell out of mine is too much.

When I’m home during the day, I leave the garage door cracked a bit so Girl can come and go as she pleases. I’m afraid it’s too hot for her to be outside all day and she doesn’t like being cooped up in the garage with the door closed. The other cats take this as their invitation to completely fuck my place up. They spray my tires! My sweet little car’s shoes have been violated! And the smell? For the love of all that is good and holy, it smells like bad urine in there. (not to be confused with good urine!)

One of them (a 3-legged bastard) actually got trapped in our garage last night when I closed it. My first instinct was to beat his piss-spraying self with a broom but I gave him a chance. I opened the door and yelled at him at the top of my lungs so his owners could hear politely gave him to the count of five to hop on out. He did.

I’ve already decided that I’m going to start collecting the cat turds and depositing them somewhere in the neighbor’s yard on a weekly basis. My first thought was to hurl them into their yard as I found them each day but I decided I wanted to go with the dramatic. A turd here and there? You might miss them. A pile of them decaying by your mailbox? No overlooking that.

27 Comments | In: excuse me while i scream, grouching | | #