I can get it if it’s a super busy day but every day? I hear people say this and roll my eyes on the inside. Do they want me to think that they are far too superior to worry about something as mundane as eating?

I bet they never poop either.

Then I was kind of bummed because I wanted some color! I told her that I really didn’t want to strip out my hair today because I’ve heard so many things about how horrible that is for your hair and it took FOREVER to get my hair looking normal after spending a lot of time highlighting it. So she said we could bleach it a little and the blue should grab on but not be too bright. That was okay. I didn’t want it too bright because I was afraid that Sweety was going to shit his pants when he saw it. I wanted subtle blue. This time. Heh.

Instead it came out crayon green. And I’m okay with it. It was really a toss-up between blue or green from the start because I like both colors. When she saw it, she said if I really wanted blue that she’d strip it out today and redo it. I told her no because I really do like the color green.

But does it look like it was caused by being in a swimming pool for too long?

I can’t get a decent photo of this. The first one had no flash on the camera and the second one did.

It was the Man’s birthday and Margaret’s family came to Reno and met me for supper. The boys showed off their fishing gear and were so cute and well-mannered that I couldn’t quit watching them.

Maybe I have a touch of baby fever.

And the next night I met Gina. We had some awesome food at a little casino and then went to watch Sweety bowl. Gina was tired.

I was tired too but I know if I fall asleep in a public place that Sweety will mess with me so I stayed awake. I’ve come to realize that bowling isn’t the most interesting thing to watch if you aren’t playing.

The majority of the trip was spent toting around a guy that came by himself and had to zoom in on every thing that we wanted to do. He smelled like he’d never seen the business end of a bar of soap and made me want to stab my eyes out. I blame him for my tequila drinking at 10 a.m. It was the only way I could cope because I’d been forbidden from telling him to take a fucking bath.

I told Sweety that we will NEVER EVER AGAIN go somewhere with a group of people to split the cost of a rental car. Next time, we will rent a tiny car that only has 2 seats.

It wasn’t really a vacation. It was like I lost a week of my life. Then when we got home? I got to work for six days in a row to make up for some of the days I’d been off. So I really lost 2 weeks of life. I’m just starting to feel normal (normal. Ha!) now.

Oh, people! I let BB drive me for the first time the other day! I thought I was having a heart attack but I lived. He’d never driven my car either (it’s the same kind as Sweety’s, just a different year) so it was exciting. I’d thought that maybe he would drive some when we go to Oklahoma in a couple of weeks but I now know that there is no way that I could sit in the passenger seat while he zooms down the interstate at 70 mph. 35 mph almost did me in. He’s a good driver but I had a huge issue with putting my life in his hands. I can’t get him to pick up his dirty clothes consistently but he’s driving? I remember when he was little and looked like a puppy! Where has the time gone?

This week has been so freaking busy. I had to work on my normally scheduled day off so I could be off yesterday to go on a field trip with LB. We went to Epcot and it wore me out.

One day this week, I shampooed the carpet after I got off work so the house wouldn’t be so grungy when the girls next door come over to dog-sit. And tonight after work I went to buy a pair of pants. I realized that I only have one pair of jeans and everything else I wear around the house is too ratty to go out in. I have a feeling that buying clothes when I’m tired and desperate wasn’t a good idea. I only got one outfit though. I think it looks okay but I have a feeling Sweety will look at me sideways in it. He will live.

I better go finish packing and getting the house clean. Oh! And I have a whole sack of bad apples to hurl into the retention pond behind the house! Losta exciting things going on here.

(Maybe you’ve seen the shirt around before…)

Let me ask you something…

When you see a friend making what you think is a bad choice – do you say something? Sometimes I don’t. (Unless I’m flat-out asked my opinion. Then I’ll tell you what I really think because you wanted to know.) You can just tell when someone has their mind good and set on something and nothing you say or do will make a difference. I think it’s sometimes best to just keep your mouth shut and when everything goes to hell in a handbasket – then you can help your friend get their shit together.

Sweety said this makes me a bad friend. A friend of mine is planning a wedding and I truly think it’s a bad idea but she has her mind set on it and I know what kind of person she is. I have kind of gently mentioned other alternatives (like, wait!) but she has no interest in them. I don’t see the point in sitting her down and going over all the reasons why I think it’s a bad idea. Nothing I say will change her mind. So why say anything and rain on her parade?

UPDATE! Thanks for your advice! Luckily, friend called me and said that the wedding is off! She caught the man in some lies and told him to buzz off. I’m glad.

Here he is fighting for his blankie. We’ll wrap his toy in the blanket and then he’ll find it. If he can’t get to it easily then he will just chew through the blanket to get the toy.

I turned around to this. Sometimes Sweety scares me.

Climbing up a woodpile to get away from a headless chicken.

Wanting to jump off the edge of a mountain when we were looking down at deer in the woods below.

Seeing the school bus full of kids going to the zoo drive by me and my grandparents while we were driving to the optometrist. They went to the zoo and I got a fucking eyepatch to wear over my lazy eye. That made headstart fun. Not.

Hiding under the covers in the bedroom I shared with my grandparents because I was afraid that Snuffleupagus was going to come out of the closet. The bedspread was pea green with little fuzzy-knobby things on it.

Getting an adult library card when I was in the third grade. Loving having the whole library at my disposal.

My little sister locking me in the bathroom when we were home alone. She knew I’d kill her if she let me out so she didn’t until Mom got home.

The way the hot tar bubbles on the road would pop when we stepped on them on our walk to the town swimming pool.

Grandma making us wear orange lifejackets to the swimming pool. We quickly taught ourselves to swim so we could ditch those things.

Learning to drive a stickshift. Deciding that I would never own such a vehicle.

The song that I was on when I danced with my first husband when we were in high school.

Listening to my sister-in-law give birth to my nephew. Thinking that I would have to have my ass knocked out if I ever had kids.

The way my nephew’s head felt on my cheek when he was a baby.

My niece’s little cone-head when she was born. She looked like Marge Simpson.

The horrible way my niece’s arm looked when she broke it under my watch and the way she bounced on the ground when she fell.

Holding Sylvie’s hand when we go places. I know she won’t let me hold it much longer.

What Sweety was wearing the first time we met.

The sneaky look on Sweety’s face after he scared the hell out of me by popping a straw on our first date. That’s when I fell in love.

LB’s face peeking at me over the edge of the bed the first morning after I’d met him. Waking me up to play and be Pink Ranger.

BB asking me if I wanted to see the surprise (engagement ring) that his daddy had hidden away for me. I told him no but he was dying to show me. We waited til Sweety got home to see it.

I started this about an hour ago. There was a purpose here but I forgot.

Wouldn’t it be nice to wear a diaper? One that wicks the urine away from your body? I think so.

Sometimes I grind my teeth. I just gnawed a hole in my shirt.

The shirt! Got it from work. Went into work today to get an email letting me know that I was the Team Captain for some game we were having. My pod had been divided into two groups and it is my job to rally my group to sell stuff.

I called Sweety freaking the fuck out because I am not a group leader. I’m at work for my basic paycheck and leave me and my social ineptness alone. He offered the prize that I could give to my team if they beat the other team.

A chicken wing party with draft beer (we cover the beer). I’m going to throw the idea out there and hope my team bites. I think my team is comprised of Amish folk that like to make quilts in their spare time though. I’m going to offer them a consolation prize.

Oliver? The best dog ever? Who has only been with us for nine days? Has already learned to ring the bell that is hanging from the doorknob with his nose when he needs to go potty. Perhaps Stinky and Tiny will follow his lead. Highly unlikely. AND he will roll over on command and when you give a short whistle he’ll flop onto his back to show you his belly. He is made of awesome.

I nibbled off all of my nails today at work. It gave me something to do and by the time I was done almost 2 hours had passed. Maybe tomorrow I will pluck my eyebrows off to help pass the time.

Something I like? Getting a nice email from someone saying that they liked my photos and they did NOT include a photo of their penis or mention whacking off. Very civilized.

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