Maybe I needed to barf that last post out because I woke up yesterday feeling okay for the first time in a long time. To make it better – I got off work early! It was slow so they were letting people off if they wanted.

I took the opportunity to go back to my doctor’s office to get the fucking cough that’s been around since August tended to. He gave me something that will hopefully stop the coughing (He said it might take a few days to work. whatever. I’m not hopeful.) and I’m going to get a chest x-ray and scan of my sinus cavity. I told him that I didn’t think I’d ever poked a bean in there but maybe I had and it was festering and making me sick. I really hope they see something with all of this. Because if they don’t then I think I will cough forever.

And I stayed home today. *cough* *cough* I’m cleaning a little and realized that the vacuum is gone. Do you know how often I actively seek out the vacuum cleaner? Like once in a blue moon. I’m guessing that Sweety took it to work with him to clean up there.

Oh people, I almost wigged out on the boys yesterday. I got home an hour early. Sweety wasn’t home. (The boys had to walk home from school a couple of days this week because he couldn’t get off in time to pick them up.) BB is in the front yard playing basketball (um, how many times have I told them to stay inside the freaking house if they’re home alone?!) and LB is there with him, shoeless. (I have a big problem with them running around shoeless. This stems from the numerous times they’ve come home from the coaew’s house with cuts on their feet or other things that they’re bitching about that could have been prevented with foot coverings.)

I feel bad that they’ve been home alone and instead of cooking ask what they want. Taco Bell. We load up in the car and during the drive it comes up that they have not let the dogs out to potty since they’ve been home from school. I was immediately so pissed off that I wanted to kick them out of my car and let them walk the last few blocks home. So you played video games in my bedroom while Stinky & Tiny howled their heads off in the adjoining bathroom and Oliver pranced at your feet? Poor Stinky Dog completely messed her bed and it’s been disinfecting all night.

For crying out fucking loud. I had no idea that I needed to tell them to let the dogs out when they came home from school. They know that they should do that!

They are going to be here this weekend and I knew if I freaked the fuck out that it would make the whole weekend shit. So I’m sweeping it under the rug. This weekend I am getting a dry erase marker and writing the things that I want them to do every day after school on the icebox. They will probably get more chores than they would have yesterday morning because I’m still pissed about them ignoring the dogs.

Tonight I’m going to put on my glitter eyeshadow and ride with Sweety to the bowling alley where I will probably drink a lot and subject everyone to my music on the jukebox. I’m beyond ready!

The reason I’m able to wear my glitter eyeshadow? I’ve been thinking for two weeks that I lost my whole makeup box but noticed it when I was taking the above photo of Oliver. I’d just stashed it away for some odd reason.

8 Comments | In: canines, daily blah, sprogs | | #

I absolutely can not stand a thief or a liar. (But, then again, who likes them? Heh.)

There is just no way to excuse these things in my book. And my book isn’t very big. Don’t lie or steal or kick animals or trip children or be mean in general. It IS okay to make faces at the loud child sitting in front of you on an airplane though. My book also gives you leeway when it comes to a coaew too.

BB found a wallet at the school baseball field yesterday. There was no name inside but there was $10. He asked me when I got home what he should do with it. Well, duh. Turn it in at the front desk at school. He then asked me if he should return the money too. WTF? Uh, yeah.

It kind of gets to me that he would even ask me these questions.

He told me today that he did turn it in and I told him that that was the right thing to do. Wouldn’t he like it if someone found his wallet and turned it in? He then told me that he didn’t think there was another kid at the school that would have done it. I told him he just put points in his Karma Bank for future use.

Now, it is a fantasy of mine to find a sack stuffed full of cocaine dusted twenties but if it doesn’t look like it came from drug dealers that aren’t smart enough to hang onto their money then you should turn that shit in.

14 Comments | In: sprogs | | #

When I come home from work to barking dogs and LB is yelling at the barking dogs – I want to stab myself in the head. Repeatedly. I literally had to bite my tongue to not shriek, “Whatthefuckareyoudoing? DoyounotHEARYOURSELF?!” About that time, Sweety walked up and mentioned that I looked on edge and proceeded to give me a shoulder rub. I was so tense that it made me scream. Not a good kind of scream either.

Oliver? The best dog ever? Who has only been with us for nine days? Has already learned to ring the bell that is hanging from the doorknob with his nose when he needs to go potty. Perhaps Stinky and Tiny will follow his lead. Highly unlikely. AND he will roll over on command and when you give a short whistle he’ll flop onto his back to show you his belly. He is made of awesome.

I nibbled off all of my nails today at work. It gave me something to do and by the time I was done almost 2 hours had passed. Maybe tomorrow I will pluck my eyebrows off to help pass the time.

Something I like? Getting a nice email from someone saying that they liked my photos and they did NOT include a photo of their penis or mention whacking off. Very civilized.

18 Comments | In: canines, randomness, sprogs | | #

I’m implementing something new. I’m not bending over backwards to make it to the boys’ baseball games or jump to get them whatever the latest gadget is that they’re wanting. They want something or they want to go on an outing – I’m referring them to Sweety. I make them mind and do chores but they know that if they really want something that I’m the person to ask about it. I admit that I’ve been the “fun” parent because I want them to like me.

They are never going to love me like they do their parents and it’s making me tired to try and be a supermom when I’m not super or a mom. I’ve spent 8 years going out of my way to be at every game and chaperon every field trip that they needed me on.

I have discovered something more embarrassing than telling a man that you love him and he says nothing – saying it to your stepsons and they say nothing. I know they can squeak it out. I hear them tell their parents all of the time. I used to tell them that I loved them when I tucked them in at night and they never said it back so I quit saying it. A few weeks ago, I thought that was no reason to not tell them since I do. But since it’s just followed with awkward silence – I give up. I know the boys love me but it’s frustrating that I put forth as much effort in all around raising them as their mother or Sweety and I’m not the same.

Last Saturday, for the first time ever – I didn’t go to a baseball game when I would have been able to. I had company and I just really wasn’t relishing the idea of sitting at the game for 3 hours with the coaew a stone’s throw away. And the world didn’t end. The boys didn’t even wonder where I was.

This weekend’s game is going to be a dramafest. They play about an hour away and they have a wedding to be in on their stepfather’s side of the family that evening. After the game, Sweety has to meet the coaew somewhere with the boys. I know what the day will be like.

They’ll get beat in the baseball game. Sweety will be annoyed. The boys will be pissy. The coaew will be calling or texting constantly trying to find out where they are. I will be pissed off that we’re having to take them to meet her because she didn’t come to the game. It’s her time with them. Yes, she has a wedding that night but if they have time to go to the game then why the fuck can’t she take them?

So I told Sweety I didn’t want to go. I have absolutely no desire to even be around the aggravation that will ensue if the game runs into overtime or Sweety can’t meet her at the appointed time. Or if he shows up at the meeting place and she isn’t there yet.

He said that he’d like for me to go but understands why I don’t want to. And guess what? I’m not having any anxiety about this Saturday since I’m avoiding it. If I was going, I’d spend all week dreading it.

I also told Sweety that I probably won’t be going to their games if he isn’t there. I’m uncomfortable being around the coaew and even more so if Sweety isn’t around to talk to.

That flaming twatwad called him this weekend to ask what size pants did BB wear because she needed to buy him dress pants for the wedding. It wouldn’t have been so bad but BB was at her house. On the couch. Watching t.v. He didn’t want to miss the football game on t.v. to go shopping so she was calling for his pants size. WTF? How hard is it to either A) Tell him to get his ass up because he as to go or B) See what size pants are on his ass? Gah. Sweety let the call go to voicemail and didn’t bother calling back.

Maybe the next time she calls crying about money problems – he can tell her to talk to her husband about a mortgage bond. It’s nice that she’s never had a pot to piss in but always manages to hook up with someone who does.

Basically, I’ve decided if something extracurricular is going to stress me the hell out or make me want to cry then I’m not doing it.

23 Comments | In: coaew, grouching, husband, paid link, sprogs | | #

There’s a little update at the end of the last post. I didn’t put it up here because I don’t want to look at it. I’m going to try and start leaving work at work. I’m thinking of wiping myself down with baby wipes in the bathroom there before I leave to symbolically wash the shit off.

Do you listen to books on tape or audiobooks? I have become addicted to Scott Sigler. I used to worship at The Altar Of Stephen King but no more. Seriously, click on over there and download one of the free audiobooks. Ancestor and The Rookie are my favorites so far. He’s doing a tour to pimp out The Rookie and I am so there. Sure, I preordered my book long ago and requested that he sign it but won’t it be so much cooler to have him sign it again in person? Or is it just stalkercrazy? Sweety says stalkercrazy with a dash of aren’t you a fucking nerd? I don’t give a rat’s left nut. I’m going and if nobody can go with me I’ll go alone and sit against the wall like a weirdo.

School started Monday and it looks like we’re doing things a little differently this year. Instead of the boys being here half the week and then at the coaew’s, they’re going to be here Monday through Friday. She will pick them up from school on Friday and take them to school Monday morning. So we won’t have them every other weekend. Sweety brought the idea up to her because if we kept the schedule as it is, LB would be getting up at 5:30 or so but doesn’t have to be at school til 8:30. He’d have to get up so early because BB’s school starts at 7:20 and their mom lives about 45 minutes away. Of course, the conversation he had with her wasn’t drama-free but at least she sees it’s better for the boys.

Anyhoo. It has been settled. Unless she changes her mind. But I don’t think she will.

* The title has nothing to do with any of this but that song has been in my head for a week now. I may have to sing it to you like the last one. Sweety has even been singing the ant song with me and LB chimes in when he hears me muttering it to myself. Insanity: It’s a family affair!

12 Comments | In: coaew, randomness, sprogs, woot! | | #